In my opinion part of “Living Victoriously” means that I am able to be a significant contributor financially in our home; which has not really been happening for the last year. Being that I have always been a financially responsible person it was extremely hard for me to take a year off of work to focus on writing/editing and publishing My Memoir. Thankfully the process was quick and painless because of the amazing team that they have working over at Friesenpress and I have been able to return to the workforce and resume feeling financially responsible.
The poem that I am sharing with you today is the prologue of My Memoir “HerStory-Victim to Victorious”. Currently it goes unnamed as "Prologue" quite simply because I found that throughout the whole process of writing/ editing of My Memoir I found that although it was not the hardest part to write… it was most definitely the longest project. I began writing it in 2009 but something about it didn't flow...didn't express the what I needed it to so I filed it away and have worked on it sporadically over the years. I had forgotten about it until I came across it just before I began my writing process and decided to try working on it again so that it fit what I was trying to say. Nothing seemed to work for me and once again I put it away out of frustration.
During my writing process I would sleep with a notepad and pen on the bedside table so that if I woke up in the middle of the night with a thought, I could write it down instead of forgetting it in my slumber. About a week before the final edit as I slept …I completed the poem…in my sleep.
When I woke in the morning the words “tranquility at last” were scribbled across the page beside the bed and the “prologue poem” was completed. Check back next Monday and I will share with you the original version but until then…enjoy this version.
What would you title this poem if you could?
The caustic noise of past transgressions…whispered softly in my ears
Telling untold secrets seductively…making simple things in life unclear
So eloquent were the beasts inside…they would tantalize and taunt
Echoes of wrongful actions penetrated harmonies ... instead instilled a haunt
Love and hatred became one the same…a darkness had covered the light
Brandished fists on high alert…twenty-four seven fight or flight
Convoluted pathways misdirected…up was left and down was right
Independently placed puzzle pieces…changed directions of this plight
Venomous predator cast from earthly realm…not a fiber of contrition
Darkness scattered exposing blinding light…being fearless came to fruition
Indiscretions deemed immoral not illegal…long since forgiven, not forgotten
Cathartic release of anguish and frustration…survival of the misbegotten
HerStory eradicates the proverbial slate…reveals wrongs bestowed on we
Unspoken speculations laid to rest… vanquish demons set them free
Imperfect heart transcends unconditional…closing the book of the past
This one Victim reins Victorious…achieving tranquility at last.
Deborah Kinisky 2014